Life is full of conflicting desires. We love cakes, but want to be lean and healthy. We like excitement and we also like security. We crave novelty, and seek the nostalgia of the familiar. We …
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Why am I so down on limerence?
A recent flurry of comments raised the issue of whether limerence is a good or bad thing, and why I generally blog from the perspective of "limerence recovery", rather than being more positive and …
Why wasn’t I good enough for them?
Limerent objects are sticky. Yuck! When deciding to go No Contact, most limerents soon discover that detaching themselves from LO is harder than expected. LOs are good at pulling you back. You …
A good summary of the purposeful mindset
I'm getting to be quite a fan of Mel Robbins. I signed up for her "best decade ever" course this year and it's great so far. While I'd (rather inevitably) nitpick the details of her pop neuroscience …
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Love and limerence (part two)
The previous post linked two common limerence dilemmas to an analysis of romantic love. First, what can you do when the romance dies with the limerence, and second, what can you do when a long-term …
Love and limerence (part one)
When Dorothy Tennov published her book, Love and Limerence, her goal was to systematically analyse romantic love and define the experience of being in love. She ended up articulating the pattern of …