Note: this is an updated version of a previous post In her landmark book, Love and Limerence, Dorothy Tennov describes how she finally formulated the concept of limerence on a long haul flight with …
Why limerence is not just a crush
From time to time I get invited to contribute to a podcast or article about obsessive love, and one of the questions about limerence that is pretty much guaranteed to come up is: Isn't that …
What is limerence?
Limerence is a mental state of profound romantic infatuation, first defined in the 1970s by the psychologist Dorothy Tennov. It is characterised by an initial period of elation and intense emotional …
Fast track to freedom
Understanding limerence is a pre-requisite for overcoming it. In the process of writing my book, I revisited a lot of the key ideas that I've been blogging about these last three years, and played …
Closure is an illusion
Uncertainty is central to limerence. It fuels the rumination that drives it (do they like me too? What did that comment mean? How would they respond to my disclosure?), and creates the intermittent …
Using limerence for mood regulation
It's an unhappy truth that limerence is worst when you're unhappy. Limerence can often start during a time of of trial: when you are exhausted, overwhelmed, stressed, lonely, grieving, or depressed. …
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