Idealisation is a big part of limerence. It’s also a big part of the ‘object’ bit of limerent object. We elevate these mysterious people who walk among us into paragons - impossible romantic ideals. …
The psychological appeal of giving in
There is something strangely seductive about surrendering your will to a craving. Even when you know it's bad for you, you yield to the compulsion. When the opportunity to indulge presents itself, you …
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Indecisive LOs
I've recently had a little flurry of correspondence from limerents who are cursed with indecisive limerent objects. These are LOs who give some definite reciprocation but then pull away, or who are …
If I only knew…
My last few posts have focussed on the issue of closure and how limerents can be bad at handling uncertainty. The principle cause of this difficulty is the deep, desperate ache to know whether or not …
The recovery mindset
One of the most difficult aspects of beating unwanted limerence is the conflict between the intellectual decision to stop it, and the emotional thirst to keep it going. This is the addict's challenge: …
The key stages of limerence (infographic)
I've discovered Canva. It's fun. Here's an infographic that summarises the key stages of a limerence episode that progresses to person addiction, before the limerent fights back: …
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