On holiday this week, so today's post is a repost from the olden days of the site (2017). I'm still fascinated by the neuroscience of beauty, and why our LOs become so dazzling during limerence. The …
Playing with fire
It's not an easy thing to abstain from bliss. For limerents in a long-term relationship who are suddenly struck by limerence for someone new, the neurochemical high from early limerence is …
Supernormal stimuli
One of the defining features of limerence - and the feature that makes it so difficult for others to understand - is the wildly exaggerated importance that we assign to our limerent objects. Why do we …
Oversharing
One of the common symptoms of limerence, is an overwhelming sense of emotional connection with the limerent object. Many limerents report feeling an easy, natural intimacy with their LO that makes …
The recovery mindset
One of the most difficult aspects of beating unwanted limerence is the conflict between the intellectual decision to stop it, and the emotional thirst to keep it going. This is the addict's challenge: …
Resolving to recover
One of the philosophical pillars of this site is that limerence isn't in itself a problem; it becomes a problem when the circumstances of a particular limerence episode cause a transition into …