The stimulus for this post is another nugget of wisdom from the coffeehouse. Adam raised the following issue: I could forgive my wife much easier for an emotional affair than a sexual one, even if …
Podcast on the Longing Lab
Quick heads up that I had a great conversation with Amanda McCracken, host of the the Longing Lab podcast, last week. We talked all things limerence and a bit about the origin of the blog and why I …
A new era for LwL
Big moment this, for me. I've been blogging here at LwL for seven years, under a pseudonym. There were various reasons why, but looking back on the first ever post, I was obviously concerned about …
Coffeehouse: signs you’re not over them
Time for another open thread for discussions about all things limerence. This week's opening topic is prompted by Mila's comment in the last coffeehouse post: Signs that you haven’t completely …
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Midlife crisis for limerents
Note: this is an updated version of a previous post Midlife is an interesting time. It begins to dawn on you that whatever endeavours you threw yourself into in early adulthood are coming to …
New project: dealing with limerence in marriage
I've been blogging recently about the impact of limerence on long-term relationships, and the devastating effect it can have on a marriage. It's been sobering to read accounts of the effect of …
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Is polyamory a solution for limerence?
Unexpected limerence in a marriage is tough. There are several reasons why married limerents might become vulnerable to the allure of a new limerent object. It's easy to slip into a state of benign …
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Limerence in the Observer
Big week for me this week. I finished the new book and sent it to my publisher! That was easy It's great to have reached that milestone, and by one of those strange coincidences of fate, my …
Coffeehouse: time travel wisdom
Time for another LwL coffeehouse post. For those new to the site, these posts are intended for open discussion about any aspects of limerence and how it affects our lives. And where fabulous …
Can a marriage recover from limerence?
I've written many times about the impact on a marriage of developing limerence for someone new. It's an existential threat under the worst conditions, and a serious hardship even in the best-managed …
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Hazardous limerent objects
In the last post we covered how fruitless it is to try and blame a limerent object for your own unwanted limerence. Even if they are to blame, it doesn't help your recovery. I stick by that principle, …
Who is to blame for limerence?
Note: this is an updated version of a previous post Limerence can be well described as an altered state of mind. Once the infatuation for someone new sets in, it changes your perceptions, your …