Super busy with the last push to complete my book at the moment, so in lieu of a blog post, here's a video. It's a productive discussion between two therapists who come to the issue of infidelity from …
Coffeehouse: beating limerence when no contact is impossible
Another visit to the LwL coffeehouse where all of life's big problems are solved. Or people spout off to their online friends. Not sure which. Maybe both Today's topic for conversation comes …
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People who like to live in uncertainty
I've opined on many occasions that uncertainty is the rocket fuel of limerence. I've tended to discuss this from the perspective of flaky LOs who give mixed messages, behave unpredictably, or want to …
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The two tribes
Note: this is an updated version of a previous post In her landmark book, Love and Limerence, Dorothy Tennov describes how she finally formulated the concept of limerence on a long haul flight with …
How common is limerence: the numbers
A long-running unanswered question about limerence is how common it is in the general population. When she first articulated the idea, Dorothy Tennov didn't really give a clear answer. She talked …
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Coffeehouse: limerence bootcamp
Another visit to the LwL coffeehouse. 'sup For newcomers, the purpose of these posts is to provide a forum for general chit chat for members of the LwL community who want to catch up and talk …
Emotional resistance, limerence and purposeful living
I've been thinking a lot recently about the emotional resistance that we feel when confronted with the need to change our lives. I argue - and sincerely believe - that the best cure for unwanted …
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Case study: Nothing works…
Clara is a midlifer who - in a story familiar to regular readers - fell unexpectedly into limerence for a co-worker. Swept away by emotion, she started an affair. "I knew it was wrong but thought …
Limerence and the second sex
I've always been rather impressed by the fact that the original text on limerence - Love and Limerence, by Dorothy Tennov - had a cover jacket blurb by Simone de Beauvoir. I mean, talk about bragging …
Skills for a healthy relationship
Many of the relationship problems created by limerence result from a conflict between the wild fantasy ideal that limerence promises and the workaday reality of actually living with another …
Coffeehouse: book update
As I mentioned at the beginning of the year, I'm currently writing a book on limerence, and am now well past the halfway mark and generally happy with progress. I'm working to an end of May …
Case study: polyamory and unwelcome limerence
Today's case study is from Ashley, a reader who is polyamorous and in a polycule with three partners. I'm going to confess at the outset that I find some of the terminology for these new social …
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