OK, maybe the title should be "limerence in the time of covid-19", but I couldn't resist the literary allusion. The current pandemic is making us all face how our lives can suddenly be thrown into …
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Why do they seem so special?
Idealisation is a big part of limerence. It’s also a big part of the ‘object’ bit of limerent object. We elevate these mysterious people who walk among us into paragons - impossible romantic ideals. …
Living with Limerence, The Book
February saw the third anniversary of the blog, and anniversaries are always a good time to pause and take stock. [Stares thoughtfully into middle distance] I started this site as way to expend …
The psychological appeal of giving in
There is something strangely seductive about surrendering your will to a craving. Even when you know it's bad for you, you yield to the compulsion. When the opportunity to indulge presents itself, you …
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Indecisive LOs
I've recently had a little flurry of correspondence from limerents who are cursed with indecisive limerent objects. These are LOs who give some definite reciprocation but then pull away, or who are …
Dealing with conflicting desires
Life is full of conflicting desires. We love cakes, but want to be lean and healthy. We like excitement and we also like security. We crave novelty, and seek the nostalgia of the familiar. We …