Limerence is an extraordinary desire. The intensity of our longing for LO falls well beyond the usual range of everyday experience, which is probably why we find it so easy to believe that our LOs …
Why do they seem so special?
Idealisation is a big part of limerence. It’s also a big part of the ‘object’ bit of limerent object. We elevate these mysterious people who walk among us into paragons - impossible romantic ideals. …
Indecisive LOs
I've recently had a little flurry of correspondence from limerents who are cursed with indecisive limerent objects. These are LOs who give some definite reciprocation but then pull away, or who are …
Beating limerence in 2020
It's 2020. Happy New Year everyone! New year, new decade, new opportunities for personal growth. As this is the time of year for resolutions, I thought I'd start with a post about how to use …
Case study: a pushy LO
It's been a while since we got specific about a personal limerence dilemma, so this week I thought it would be good to tackle another case study. Elle got in touch with me (via a temporary gmail …
Closure is an illusion
Uncertainty is central to limerence. It fuels the rumination that drives it (do they like me too? What did that comment mean? How would they respond to my disclosure?), and creates the intermittent …